Getting back into the swing of things….plus a savory sprinkle to up your vegetable/pasta game!

I’ll admit it, I’m horrible at keeping up with a blog.  I have the best of intentions but the fact that it takes me forever to write a post coupled with fact that my intentions have not manifested themselves into fruition have made this an easy place to avoid.   I changed the direction of the blog a few months ago to try and create some accountability for myself in my fitness/weight-loss goals.   I’m a few pounds less than when I started but truth be told, it’s more from a recent stomach bug than any true loss.  I’m realizing that I need to figure out why, on some level, I don’t want to lose weight. Because if I really did, I’d do it.  I’d eschew the sugar, the snacking on high carb foods (I’m not carb hating, believe me.  I ADORE me some brown rice but when I snack on it to the tune of probably 400 extra calories, something needs to change),  and just get it done.  I have made some super positive changes; Starbucks is basically gone.  I had one a couple days ago and couldn’t finish it; it was too sweet.   I’ve increased my exercise.  But that’s about it.  I haven’t gotten into the mindset of someone with a goal who is focused on achieving it.  And I need to figure out why and I’m not sure I’m going to do it with a blog.  That doesn’t mean I’m not going to write about what’s going on, because I will.  I still think some introspection is necessary and writing it down sharpens the clutter in my brain.

 

However, while I’m figuring out my baggage, I do want to get back to being informative about nutrition and how to help people affect their health positively.  I’ll start off with just a little post about things I do to make my food taste delicious.  I used to love parmesan cheese.  I’d put it on rice, pasta, veggies…pretty much anything and when I went vegan I did miss it.  The thing I did learn however, is that cheese, all cheese is essentially concentrated salt and fat, neither of which is doing our bodies any good, so I tried to create some of those flavors in a whole food, plant based way and I came up with this yumminess.  IMG_5054

What we have here is about a cup of cashews (but any nut will work.  I’ve used almonds, walnuts, macadamias), about 3 heaping tablespoons of nutritional yeast, a shake of garlic powder and about 3/4 teaspoon of salt.  Whirl it up in a food processor (blender, nutribullet, what have you) until you have this:

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The chunks can be big or small, your choice, and then use with abandon on whatever your heart desires!  The nuts provide healthy fats, the salt is there but way less than you’d find in cheese, the nutritional yeast (nooch) gives a cheesy flavor and the garlic (or onion powder, I’ve done both) is for fun, you can definitely do without it.  I’ll put it on rice, pasta, sprinkle it over vegetables, there are so many options.

 

So, here I am, back again, planning on a more regular showing this time around.  Hope you’ll stay tuned!

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11/28/2017 Thanksgiving for the loss!

We were out of town on a Sunday and I  purposefully didn’t weigh on off days; I didn’t want to be  lulled into complacency or depressed by a non weigh day number.  Sunday came around and woot!  Down almost 1 pound, vacation AND Thanksgiving, boom shakalaka laka boom shaboom!  I’m pretty happy.  It’s coming off.  It’s unbelievably slow (to the point of irritation) but it’s coming.  I’m noticing a couple things as well:  my pants are a teensy bit looser and I’m not seeing as much of a roll over the waistband as I used to.  These are small victories, to be sure but they are victories.  I didn’t make 127 by that day but I’m realizing that I    need to stop setting deadlines for specific weights…it just adds stress and as long as there’s progress, I     don’t need to be causing issues.

I am having a mindset issue however.  I  feel like my weightloss has been almost in spite of what I’ve been doing.  I had a couple days where I was fairly unhappy and didn’t eat all that much because I wasn’t hungry and I wonder if that contributed to the loss.  We also have sugar in the house; my parents sent us some amazing desserts from Sticky Fingers and I’ve been partaking.  Not a lot and not everyday but seeing as I was doing well, not adding sugar at all, it feels like a slide.  Coffee is still an issue and I feel like a failure for not being able to kick it.  Because here’s the thing, if I wanted to, I would, right?  So this feels like something I need to look at…it’s kind of along the lines of feeling like maybe I  don’t really want this and if not, why?  Because I do.  I don’t feel good in my skin,  I don’t feel pretty or sexy.   All which begs the question (although I just found out that, that is not the correct use of that fallacy.  Don’t care, you all know what I mean), why am I sabotaging myself?  Why is it so hard to get into the mindset of a goal setter?  Of an athlete, of someone who wants to accomplish something?

 

Here’s the thing:  I  really DO want these things.  I want to be uninjured and a climber and biker and lifter.  I  want to get my NP and help people.  I want to be a great mom and wife and have a clean, uncluttered house.  I’m just not sure how to go about it.  Maybe the first step is to just say it.  To acknowledge that these things are not in balance right now and I  need to take steps to correct it. After they’re gone, I’m ditching sweets for December.  And starting Sunday, I’m losing SB.  I’m going to take steps to make sure that I can get my coffee fix but no more SB just because I’m out of the house.  The sweet thing will difficult because of the holiday but I  can do it.   Now I  need to work on getting exercise despite all my various injuries.  Next post!

One day at at time! 11/10/17

Didn’t kick the Starbucks.  Kept coming up with excuses why I *ahem* needed to go get one when it really was just habit and laziness.  Yesterday I got irritated and decided I was going to  do without, so I did.  And then I did it again today.  I need to keep this roll going. I’m starting work after over 2 months off and I usually get a coffee on the way to work.  I am going to make a cup and take it with me so I don’t break my “streak”.

One reason I didn’t quit was that I lost weight, despite having one almost every day.  I went back down 0.6 pounds.  I have to think though, is it worth it?  It’s expensive, it’s definitely not helping my goals and it really doesn’t fit with the mindset I say I want to have.

This week has been pretty good, extra coffees notwithstanding.  I had almost no prepared foods, no added sugar and tried to do really well with the meal plans.  Tomorrow is a weigh day so we’ll see how it manifested.

Back to discuss 11/1/17

The damage wasn’t horrible (up 0.8) but any movement in the wrong direction is irritating.  So now the goal is to be 127 by 11/17/17.  This is a little more than 2 weeks and I need a plan to make it happen.  First order is going to be cut the Starbucks.  I’ve toyed with it for a while, now I’m just going to kick it to the curb.  I don’t need it and it’s getting in the way of my goals.  I need more snack type food that isn’t potatoes or rice and I need to have it accessible.  I snack way too much (which should also be addressed) so the mindless popping of food into my mouth should be of minimal impact.  I need to get better with planning my meals and making breakfast and or a salad ahead of time.  It’s too easy to leap into a frozen burrito or the like and then I don’t have control of what I’m putting in my body.  I really do need to do a My Fitness pal for a few days just to see what kind of calories I’m taking in.  It’s so hard when you aren’t doing a ton of processed stuff because then you have to put it all in their database.  It’s just excuses though and I am done with those.

A little disjointed…

Okay, 2 weeks in and this week I was down 0.8!  I don’t know if my commitment to no added sugar helped but it sure didn’t hurt.  Man, it was tough those first 2 days.  I had to be really, really conscious of my actions and even actively make myself not eat something, which shows me that I was being mindless way more than I had thought.  I also feel like my overall eating mindlessly decreased along with it which probably helped.  It’s interesting though, as I got on the scale, I was nervous; I wasn’t sure I was going to see a change which tells me I still have work to do in the eating department.  I have a conference in a week which serves a TON of delicious plant based food so that week is going to be a challenge.  I’m going to strategize how to succeed during that week. Until I go there, I’m going to keep on not eating added sugar.  I’m already feeling tentative on that goal but I think if I just keep with the momentum it’ll get easier.  It also makes me plan more because I can’t just pop a Clif bar if I want to, I have to have something more healthy, either before or in the car for “emergencies”.

 

This got tabled as our week got cray-cray!  I’m picking this up fully 2 weeks later.  I lost 0.2 last week and am heading into a weigh in tomorrow.  Pretty sure there’ll be a gain.  The food was amazing at the conference and I just ate way too much of it.  I did get some exercise in which was good but probably not enough to counter all that yummy plant based goodness.

So now I’m here with a renewed commitment to be in this for the long haul.  0.2 pounds is ridiculous but it is a loss and I’m going to take it.  I’ll deal with whatever gain I had and go from there.  What I do need to do is come up with a stronger game plan.  I like keeping with the no added sugar aspect.  I think that helped because I am most definitely addicted to sugar.    Of course, the tabs on my computer are all pretty much recipes I’ve been looking at and most of them are sweets.

Goal for this weight loss journey, November edition:  No added sugar in my food (basically I’m meaning no sweets) until we leave for Seattle.  I might be able to do it through Seattle but I’m making some pie for Thanksgiving.  And if I make it, Imma gonna eat it!  So, this goal will help because if I can be down 2 pounds by then (which is totally doable) then I won’t feel like I’m going in the holidays behind the 8 ball.

Second goal November:  lose 2 pounds (from 129, not from whatever weight I’m going to see tomorrow) by the time we leave for Seattle.  This may take some real effort, especially if tomorrow is ugly.  I’ll be back soon to talk about what steps I’m going to take.

 

“Success is a decision”

Getting real.

These last couple days (it’s Tuesday) haven’t been great.  I made brownies, have been eating them.  I bought processed vegan food, have been eating it.  I haven’t been planning my meals, not really.  So these are not the actions of someone who is trying to change her life/body.    I am sitting here, making plans that will help my goal: no processed foods, cutting out added sugar and I am not typing them because as I think about typing it, I’m already planning on how I’m going to break that commitment.  So fucked up!  I have serious issues around food, which I knew but it’s really disturbing how deep they go.    Okay, that’s it.  Starting tomorrow, I’m cutting out added sugar.  I’m going to do it for the rest of the week and I’m going to do it to prove to myself that I can do it.  I’m not going to include what I put in my coffee but everything else is verboten.  4 days, Wednesday through Saturday, this should be easy.  I am stronger than this.  I am better than this.  I’m not some silly teenager who is a slave to her taste buds, I’m a strong woman who wants to be a role model to her children and others.

Starting out…

Midway through week one of being committed to this goal.  Things are…decent, I’d say.  I weighed in at 130.6 on Sunday and I’m reasonably okay with that since my exercise since breaking my ankle has been next to nil.  My previous post I talked about going balls to the wall and I don’t think I’ve done that.  What I have done is become way more aware about what I’m putting in my mouth and I’ve started really focusing on it in a way I haven’t done before.  My snacking is down,  and I’ve been planning my meals more.  I talked about not bringing junk home but sure enough, a couple nights ago I bought cookies “for the girls”.  They do end up eating them but if I’m being completely honest, they were for me.  I was able to refrain though, which I was happy about.  I have had a couple (3 ) small tastes but no full cookie.  What I’m planning on is seeing if this hyper awareness translates to a loss on the scale.  If it doesn’t, then I’ll know I need to get even more focused. What will be something to look at is: why did I need to buy the junk in the first place?  Am I that much a slave to my taste buds?  Is it a sense of missing out?

 

I’ve started an “Intention Wheel which I bought here and I’ve been using it to do things that are good for my health and weight loss.  I have things like drinking water (48 oz which isn’t a ton but it’s a big step up for me), pushups, planks and no added sugar.  I’m trying to create habits that will translate to improved health.  The exercise bits are laughable but I’ve gotten out of the habit so badly, I need to start somewhere.  My broken ankle is a deterrent but I know many people who would still be in the gym doing upper body weights. That’s going to be me but I need to make room for it in my life.

 

 

So, I promised pictures last time, didn’t I?  This was the picture that kind of did it for me.

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We went up to a friend’s house at Sandpoint and we swam and SUP’d and kayaked.  I had a great time but I wasn’t thrilled about being in a swimsuit.  I wasn’t about to let my discomfort ruin the time with my girls but once I saw this picture I knew things needed to change.  Despite fitting into my clothes, albeit not in the way I’d like, I’d gotten….heavy.  Not compared to some but that had been my out, that no matter how I looked, there were others who looked worse heavier than I did and so I made excuses.

As a comparison, here’s a few from when we got married:

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I definitely felt more comfortable in my skin in those and that’s what I’m trying to get back to.  Hasta la vista for now!